Work Backwards
“Most of us spend too much time on what is urgent and not enough time on what is important.”
I’m writing this after returning home from a funeral. My good friend’s wife lost her battle to cancer. She was only 42.
Many of the friends, who I grew up with, have been by his side since we heard the devastating news. What can you tell him? What are the right words to say? I didn’t know what to say when I saw him. I just gave him a big hug.
It’s in these unfortunate moments when you have a sense of clarity and can truly focus on what really matters in life. In your 30s and 40s, you’re not thinking about your legacy or how people will remember you. You might be focusing on your family or growing in your chosen career path. Maybe both.
One of the wisest things I was told was to start from the end and work backwards. No matter how old you are, this can apply to you. It’s hard to do, but this is an exercise I like to do myself as well as with clients. Nobody has ever asked them the following questions.
Picture your own funeral, who do you see there? What will they be saying about you? Are they happy that they got to share a part of their life with you? Are they going to be talking about your fancy car and how much money you made… or what a big heart you had and how caring you were?
It’s obvious how we would want to answer these questions at that moment, but our actions throughout our life say something different. We are often impressed by and prioritize the wrong things. I’m 1000% guilty of this.
An old social media post of mine.
I have always been a hard worker. I’m usually working on the weekends and late during the week. My intentions are to work hard and continue to grow our business so I can provide for my family. But instead of being in the office on a Sunday, I could be spending time with my family. Maybe take my boys to a sporting event. Or go out to dinner with my wife.
Somehow, my brain is stuck in this loop where I tell myself that I have to work super hard in order to be able to have the “luxury” to spend more time with the people I love. When I can just cut out the “middleman” and do what I really want in the first place.
Why do we fool ourselves in this manner? God forbid, they might not be here and it might be too late to spend time with them.
Rosa, my wife, recently asked me a question that took me aback. She asked me, what memories would our 3 boys have of me when I am gone. Are they going to remember the father that was always busy with work or the dad that was caring and spent time with them?
Our 3 boys are young men now. They are no longer in those impressionable years, but it’s never too late and I still crave spending more time with them. I still struggle with this, but I am trying to change. If you have young children, I encourage you to take a moment and ask yourself the same question that Rosa asked me.
Even if you have adult children or no children at all. I’m sure there are people in your life that mean a lot to you. What memories will they have of you when you are gone? Are they the type of memories you want them to have of you? If not, what would you do to change the outcome?
There’s still time!
~Alex
Whenever you’re ready, there are 3 ways I can help you!
Organize Your Money Course: Are you ready to take control of your financial future, instead of letting it control you? This course will help relieve your financial anxiety and get you back on track.
Book a 1-on-1 Meeting: Whether you’re looking for assistance with your financial planning needs or are in the financial industry and you want to learn how to grow your practice, I can help.
Lake Avenue Financial: If you’re looking to build a relationship with a team who can help simplify, educate, relive the stress caused by money decisions and make sure you are on your way to financial independence, we are here to help!
Be Inspired to take Action
Join over 6,000 readers of the Inspire Action newsletter for tips, uplifting stories and actionable steps to guide you through your financial journey.